First, why we started WTFSEO
Quite simply, we started WTFSEO to Make SEO Great Again! It’s been almost 2 years since we started this journey – and frankly it hasn’t been as rewarding as we’d hoped when it comes to ad dollars. That’s why we need you, gentle applicant, to join our team and help us fill our pockets with your hard earned cash – a small portion of which we may be convinced to share with you.
If we like you, we’ll beg, annoy, stalk, and harass you until you just give in and start writing for us.
Many of our applicants apply. The most common application method is to send us an email with “guest post opportunity” in the subject line. Occasionally, we will scrape the bylines of SearchEngineWatch and other parody blogs we like and go after their writers. If you’ve been featured on one of our competitors, we will probably approach you about working for us too. If you turn us down, that’s when things get weird.
Here’s an example of a recent application we received:
Hello, my name is Karl Wittgenstein
I recently looked through your website. To tell you the truth, I like the material you publish. I was wondering: do you accept guest posts? If yes, I would like to send you some pitches. If no, it will be great if you reply “unsubscribe” and I will not be bothering you anymore)
Anyway, thank you! Look forward to collaborating with you
You’ll meet us at a bar.
Some call working from a bar an attempt to be hip or cool. We call it Tuesday. Meeting at a bar serves several purposes. Firstly, it allows us to judge your culture fit by what type of drink you order. Secondly, it provides a public meeting place in case you happen to be a psychopath. Most importantly, it allows us to sneak away under the guise of using the bathroom and stick you with the tab.
We’ll ask you to write something for free.
And not just once! We’ll start off asking you to write a sample post – which we will then turnaround and post without attribution. If it performs well, we’ll ask you to write another one. By the time you stop providing us with free material, we’ll have moved on to the next “applicant.”
We’ll annoy you with brain teasers
We will spend at least 1/2 the interview asking you about crossing a bridge with a flashlight, determining which light bulb is controlled by which switch, or walking us through your estimate of how many gas stations there are in the US. We realize these have nothing to do with the job, but we enjoy making applicants uncomfortable. There are multiple ways to solve every problem, but at WTFSEO we aren’t looking for the employee who will call Boeing to determine the weight of a 747 – we want the one who builds a water displacement system and tows that plane to the lake.
Do you look good in a red hat?
Google makes their new hires wear “noogler” hats. We kind of do the same thing. All WTFSEO interviewees must wear our “make SEO great again” hat during the interview. Please bring $21.95 (exact change only) to cover the cost of the hat rental fee (non refundable).
We aren’t for everybody
Did you not get that gig at IPullRank? If you’re willing to work for free, without attribution, and put up with our bullshit, then what are you waiting for? Start writing a post for us today.